There are times when family affairs disappoint you. On page 79 ‘Outside the Box’, there are five suggestions on how to handle disappointment. What do you think of each suggestion? If you do not have issues that are family related (include the wider family, adoptive family, guardian), consider other disappointments in your life with other people who are supposedly close to you.
I think the first suggestion is quite good as we have to take it easy on ourselves for the next few days after the event that is disappointing or saddening. When you are feeling down, remember to do somethings that make you feel good. For me, I would think of how much I had contributed to the school and receiving the leader of that year award. I would also think about the happy times I spent with my family at restaurants all over Singapore.(PS: I love food) When I think of these, it really enlightens me from the burden of disappointment. It would distract me from the problem that I face in the past, present and future. (I hope)
In my opinion, the second suggestion is an all rounder as it can solve all the problems that you might/had faced in the future or past. For me, even like minor things like walking a longer way to a destination. In the positive side is that you can exercise more. Another case is that my parents would always want me to work even harder, this is also so for the other parents in the world. Most of the students always complaint that they are always tired and like to procrastinate because they are lazy. Chinese would always say,‘bitter first then sweet’ or ‘good medicines are always bitter’. Our parents want us to work harder now so that we can have a more comfortable for yourself, your family and your children. Once you are successful in your career and family, you would understand why your parents would nag at you every day.
With the help of the previous two suggestion, you should always remind yourself that the disappointment would not be in your heart forever.(third suggestion) Remember to let bygones be bygones and let go of that problem by telling someone you trust and continue to lead a better life. Remember to be strong and not bottle up the problem by yourself. There would always be a someone to lend a listening ear to your problem, it could be a teacher, friend or parent.
I strongly agree to the last part of the fourth statement ‘talk to someone’. I find it the best compared to all of the ways to express your emotions in that statement. Pending your emotion in journal/diary instead of telling someone is an action which I find not as good as telling someone. Writing your journal is just like keeping it to yourself. Telling someone is better as you can open up your bottle of problem by telling it all out. The person might be able to give comfort you/give you professional advice or direct you to someone who can solve the problem for you.
I love the fifth suggestion very much as I always do that no matter how my day could be. Remember to write those things that happened that day that make me happy. For me, I could think of a day where my friend’s parent celebrated my 11th birthday the whole day with my friend. We went to eat at a Japanese Restaurant, played at an arcade and we went to watch ‘Horton’s hears a Who’. I am not so sure of the title but it is somewhere there. Even at the most depriving day, I could even think that I drank a cup of bubble tea which made me happy again. This method is really effective.
*To answer the above question, you could consider if you agree each of the suggestions and decide if they could really be useful in helping you to get over your disappointment(s) with your siblings/parents/cousins/guardians, etc.