05 Extensive Reading Question for Chapter 5 Stabbing at the Back
1. Joey’s Pain
Turn to page 146, do the ‘Where do you stand’ quiz.
After I took the quiz, for the first question, my answer to it is ‘No’, as I do not want to hurt other people and offend them by doing this. For the second question, my answer to it is ‘No’ too, for the third one, my answer is ‘No’, for the fourth one, my answer to it is ‘No’, but for the fifth one, it is ‘yes’. However, I am not always the type of person like question 5; I do not always stand by and watch other people get bullied, but sometimes I will because I do not want myself to offend the bully and be a victim as well when protecting my friends.
Why should Joey feel ashamed when he came back to school?
He felt ashamed when he came back to school as no one, especially no student in the school has ever tried to kill himself by using a knife to cut his throat, and he felt that he was the only one who had done that and was alone then. One more thing why he felt ashamed was also because he did not know how to explain to his classmates about it.
The author of the article said ‘ I don’t know whatever happened to him’. What do you think happened to Joey?
I think what happened to him was that he was taken away to the police station or the police headquarters by the police and that he got a lighter sentence from the police since it was that he was being bullied at school that cause him to try to kill his sister, or shoot his sister, whereby he was being jailed and maybe sent into a boy’s school.
If you were Maggie Jo Kundla who wrote this article, and you felt so strongly that you have to contact Joey to try say you were sorry, what are the possible things you could you do to find him?
If I were Maggie, I would not want to hesitate to contact him to try to say I was sorry for what I had done, and instead of waiting for me to meet him somewhere to say it, I will go to his house and to where he was bought, like the police headquarters(jail) or the boy’s school to apologise to him as I do not want and is unable to take the guilt anymore, of what I had caused him to be.
- Memoirs of a Ganger
Why do you think people join a clique or group or gang?
I think why they do this is because they want to have some fun and that they will feel the comfort in it. They need comfort so that when anyone happens to come up to them and try to bully or tease them, or when anything bad happens to them, they will have some support from their group. Being in a clique can also make them have more courage to face some things which they may not dare to face when they are alone, and this can really help someone who is like this to complete some of the tasks which they think they will not be able to fulfill, and that is why some people join a clique.
How long was Jesse in the group before she realized she was really not welcomed and wanted by the rest of the girls?
She was in the group until she found out one day that the rest of the girls were not behaving normally and talking to her, responding to her and ignoring her instead. That was during high school and she only found out and realized that she was really not welcomed and wanted by the rest of the girls when they even hid in the bathroom atop the toilets when they see her coming.
List three ways in this article that showed that the author of this article, Terry, was a bully or unkind and disrespectful to her peers.
First of all, Terry was a bully and was unkind and disrespectful to her peers in a way that she joined and formed a clique which caused her behaviour and attitude towards her peers to change, and she even make one of her peers, Jesse, become her clique’s scapegoat, that Jesse does not know anything about the clique and continues to get hurt by it. Secondly, when she knows that Jesse will and has got hurt by the clique, she did not do anything to help her, but instead just stand by and show no care at all. Thirdly, she was a bully as she did not even care and instead just watch and listen to the members in her clique talking behind their peers’ back about them, bad things about them, and this is worse than just saying nasty things about others.
Why didn’t Terry leave the clique when she knew it was not a very healthy one?
She was quite immature at that time and did not really think of anything about leaving the clique or hurting her peers’ feelings. She also did not really know that her peers will be hurt by her actions, she just stay in the clique to see others getting hurt and did not realise anything about it. She feels comfort to be with her friends, and was having so much fun seeing her peers being teased by the members in her clique that she did not want to leave the clique too.
3. Hung Out to Dry
Consider the friends /classmates or people you spend time with. Would you think that they are healthy for you?
Yes, they are indeed healthy for me. They are people who I trust and people whom most of them I should know by now. All of them are very healthy and they do not do bad things, gossip or rather hurt me, at least none of them had done this before. They will not harm me too and cause me to get into trouble, unlike Lindsey’s friends in this story. Though some of them do joke with me about me, I am still be able to take it as I know they are not serious. Other than this, there is really nothing bad they have done to me so far, or at least that none of them have done anything bad so far too which will affect me.
In your own words, say what you think ‘five finger discounted’ means.
In my own words, I think ‘five finger discounted’ means stealing something secretly from somewhere, especially a shop, which is also known as shoplifting, or even from someone.
Lindsey ‘was speechless’ when her two ‘best friends’ didn’t say a word to help her out and left the store in the clear. Why was she reacting this way?
She was reacting this way as she was in a mixed of feelings and therefore she did not know what to say, being speechless. She did not know what to do, and did not understand why and how could her best friends cause her to be caught by the security guards and did not say anything to help her, just leave her in the dark and push all the blame to her. She was definitely feeling very disappointed and angry with her friends at that time.
Although it was her mom who forbade Lindsey to talk to K.C. and Sarah, why would she be ashamed to talk to her two friends even if she could?
She was ashamed to talk to her two friends even if she could do so as she knows that her two friends know about what happened to her, especially when it comes to such bad things, such crimes(shoplifting) which she had committed, and she does not want to bring the matter up again to her friends who may feel guilty together with her. Her two friends were the ones who had caused her to commit the crime.
What would be some possible warning signs that your friends may not be good for you?
One of the possible warning signs that my friends may not be good for me is that they keep ignoring me and do not respond to me whenever I face huge problems and ask them or seek them for help, or rather when I talk to them, which will only hurt me. Friends which hurt me are definitely not good for me. Another possible warning sign is that my friends gossip about me, talk behind my back about me, and do not care about me, instead, they shout at me and say offensive words to me, and of course this will hurt me even more. Any kind of bully by my friends against me are not good for me.
4. Forgiving the Unforgivable
What would you deem to be one thing that you would never expect a good friend would do to you?
I will deem that I would never expect a good friend of mine to start to betray me, to start to stay away from me, to start to leave me alone in the dark and let me feel upset of lonely, to stop caring about me, even when I approach them when I face problems which I cannot solve. I shall not expect my friend to offend me in any way, even when they are in a bad mood as me and my good friend had known each other for a lot of years, it is not worth it offending each other and quarreling over small matters which will only cause us to end our friendship right here.
How was Alison different from Andi?
Alison was different from Andi in a way that she had a lot of admirers. Another thing which Alison was different from Andi was that she was interested in horses and making new friends, while Andi was interested in boys and partying, like a social butterfly, and this was during sometime between middle school and high school.
Do you think it was acceptable that Alison ‘hooked up’ with Andi’s ex-boy friend? Give reason(s) to support your answer.
Yes, I think it was acceptable that she ‘hooked up’ with Andi’s ex-boyfriend. The reason why I think it is acceptable is that Andi had already broken up with her boyfriend and it is always okay for others to start a new relationship with him. By doing this, Alison was not interfering in anything, most importantly not Andi’s relationship with her boyfriend, as it has already ended, so it is acceptable.
Andi ‘decided to forgive’ her friend? What are your thoughts about this decision?
Basically, I think that her decision to forgive her best and closest friend was correct. I mean, Alison having a relationship with her ex-boyfriend does not really concern her anymore, at least not after such a long time. Anyhow, Alison still did inform her about her being ‘hooked up’ with Andi’s ex-boyfriend, and this is very good of her, to have let out the truth to Andi instead of keeping it from her, which will only hurt Andi more when she founds out about this. It is always not worth losing a close and best friend over just a guy, which is Andi’s ex-boyfriend, as Alison was the friend whom she had known for a long time and who had comforted her when she had problems.
5. You to Blame
Do you believe that the first love you’ll ever have would always be the only true love? Give a reason(s) for your answer.
Yes, I do believe that the first love I will ever have will be my only true love. This is so as there is something known as fate in the world and when I meet someone who has fate with me, then it will be very hard to separate both of us. Even though and even when there may be some problems and quarrels along the way in between our love, these quarrels will surely come to an end, and if it does not, there are still people around me like my parents which can help me to deal with such quarrels and problems over both small and big matters. Sometimes we may quarrel because we have different views, perspectives, therefore it is not difficult to let this come to an end.
What were the possible questions or words said before the responses of
1) “I’m not ready for a relationship’ and
2)“ I’m not feeling for you the same way”?
- The possible questions or words said before this may be ‘do you like me?’, ‘do you
have at least some feelings towards me?’ or ‘do you want me as your boyfriend
- As for this, they may be ‘how long are we waiting to get married?’, ‘how long do I need
to wait for you to tell me that you really love me?’ or ‘can you provide and shower me
with all your love?’
When ‘something plays like a record in a broken dream’, what does that imply about the thoughts of the person involved?
It implies that to the thoughts of the person or to the person who is involved, these words of ‘I am not ready for a relationship’ sounds like a dream to them, sounds like something which they cannot believe and understand why when they hear it, sounds like something which is fake and that it should not be happening to the particular person.
What would be some healthy and useful thoughts to help deal with being rejected or dumped by a boyfriend or girlfriend or a close friend?
Some healthy and useful thoughts to help us deal with such situations are to think of something good which has happened to us, which is going to happen to us or even something good which is happening to us right at that particular time or moment. Another example is to think of the good memories we had with our close friends, boyfriends or girlfriends, and then try to forget them as time comes and passes by. Then, at this time, we should think about the positive things which being dumped by them had given us the opportunity to achieve and start to do, like being able to start a new relationship and find new friends where we can learn more about them.
6. Thunder Still Roars
Do you think it is okay to have pre-marital sex or are you one who advocates sex only after marriage?
Yes, I think it is okay to have pre-marital sex but provided that it is after school ends, or after you stop attending schools. I feel that the minimum age a person can have sex will be about 25 years old. But, I still recommend that sex is better after marriage as it is when the couples had agreed to stay together forever, unlike being just boyfriends and girlfriends whereby at any time they can be separated due to some reasons, like quarreling over matters.
What were the things Madison and her boyfriend used to do together?
The thing which they used to do together were typical high school things, like hanging out with one another, spending time together with one another, being by each other’s side, watching movies at each other’s homes together all night long or going out to a party and socializing.
What were the signs to show that Madison’s boyfriend had changed his attitude towards her?
Madison’s boyfriend stop and did not get permission from her when he tried something on her(sex), where he have not done this before; he always ask Madison for permission when he wanted to try something. He stopped calling her at night and starts to get annoyed with her when she called him instead. He also did not call her during the morning as a wake up call for her, as a human alarm clock for her to wake up, to welcome her to a brand new day, when he usually does. Lastly, he stopped waiting outside the door of his house for her when she came to his house.
Why do you think Madison’s boyfriend dumped her the night after he had sex with her?
Madison’s boyfriend do not feel that they should be together and I think he dumped her because he had no feelings towards her anymore, and was not in love with her anymore, and that he does not feel like he wants to be by her side anymore. I think why this is happening is maybe also because that their relationship had lasted for a very long time and it became as boring as the days passes by.
Why do you think ‘Thunder Still Roars’ was chosen as the title for this article?
I think ‘Thunder Still Roars’ was chosen as the title for the article as the roaring sound of thunder will remind the author(Madison) about the night of her separation with her ex-boyfriend(during the night it was raining) and the fact that her ex-boyfriend dumped her will remind her of thinking carefully next time before she does anything, the lesson which she had learnt from this experience with the ex-boyfriend.
7. Standing Short
Have you been or witnessed someone being humiliated by a teacher? How did you handle it or feel?
Yes, I have witnessed someone being humiliated by a teacher in my secondary school before, but I have not gone through the experience of being humiliated by a teacher before. This may be simply because I do not talk much in class and always does my homework properly, so my teacher has trust in me and does not humiliate me. I handled the fact that this happened to my friend by comforting him when that happened, or at least when I had the chance to approach him on a one to one conversation, not during class. I will not want him to suffer this type of humiliation anymore.
After the humiliation, how did Allyssa deal with the incident initially?
She told her parents and others teachers about the humiliation from her teacher, saying that she was too short to become the oldest daughter.
What did Allyssa finally take away from that same incident?
She finally took away and learnt that the way that she treats people is very important, be it the words she say to them or the things she do to them. She also learnt not to judge others by the way they look(their outlooks), like how tall they are, the clothes they wear or what they look like, but instead she learnt to judge other people by who they are. With this, I want to add one proverb, ‘Do not judge a book by its cover’.
What would be one thing you wished your teachers would do better in their treatment of students. Why?
One thing which I wished teachers would do better is that they should be more patient to the students, have more trust in them, as not everyone is perfect, not every student is able to accomplish everything which he/she gives to them. Teachers should not humiliate students because of the fact that the students has hurt them by not scoring well in academic areas, not able to accomplish the tasks they assigned, not finishing the work the teachers gave to them or even on things which are happening in school that is between the student and the teacher as that will hurt the students, and I am sure that is not what the teachers plan to do.
If you had the good fortune of only meeting teachers who treated you well all these years, what would be the one thing you would want your teachers to keep doing?
I would want the teachers to keep their trust in me and wait for me to accomplish what I need to accomplish as their student, like showing them that I had learnt something from them, or maybe even doing up a card for them, a thank you card, to prove to them that you are grateful to them for teaching you and the way they treat you over the years.